Writing Your Goal Setting Planner in a kind way

I’m a workaholic, a person who can’t live without goals. For years, the end of December meant a full-on “strategy session”: buying a new goal setting planner, listing big and small goals, organizing them by quarter, month, and sometimes even week. On the outside, it looked productive and intentional. But inside, I rarely felt joy in the process. It was like carrying a weight I had to hold up, all the time.

source: unsplash

Why “Be Kind to Yourself” Matters When Setting Goals

This story isn’t just mine.

I know so many people like me—high-achievers, ambitious, always pushing limits. And yet, we only get one body, one mind, and one heart.When all three are constantly pushed to the edge, what greets us isn’t success. It’s burnout.  I already have a supervisor at work — someone who monitors my progress, sets expectations, and keeps me accountable. I don’t need another one living in my bag, disguised as a planner. I didn’t want to turn my dreams into another checklist, or let my quiet hopes be interrogated like performance metrics. My goal setting planner began to feel less like a companion and more like a clipboard — ticking off boxes, measuring worth by output.

That’s why in 2025, I chose to do things differently. No more over-packed plans. No more chasing a superhero version of myself. Instead, I rewrote my goal-setting planner with one rule: be kind to myself. The magic? I still reached the important milestones—but with more peace, more presence, and way more joy.

You can grab my small art print Be Kind To Your Self here.

1. Set Goals Honestly – Not to Prove Anything

In my twenties, I’d set 4 to 6 goals every year. There was this pressure—peer pressure, social media pressure, self-imposed pressure—that whispered: “Do more. Be faster. Achieve harder.”

Looking back, most of what I accomplished gave me a quick dopamine hit… and then faded away. From 2025 on, I made a different choice: fewer goals, but ones I could enjoy working toward.

I now stick to three core goals:

• One career goal (either related to my 9-5 job or my creative project, like building Miodoi Illustration)
• One personal goal (like journaling every day to reconnect with myself)
• One relationship goal (such as spending more meaningful time with my family)

With just 1–3 true priorities, I see more clearly what really matters. Writing them down isn’t just planning—it’s sending a signal to my brain: “Here’s what’s worth my energy.”

That’s why I designed The Becoming Planner—a space that holds more than goals. It includes self-inquiry prompts and daily affirmations to help you grounded and self-connected while you move forward.

2. Be Flexible – You’re Human, Not a Machine

A goal should be a compass, not a cage.

That’s one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned after countless times forcing myself through plans even when my body and mind were pleading for rest.

When I started building Miodoi Illustration—my first heart-led creative brand—I had plans for everything: drawing, web design, marketing emails… all the things.

But the deeper I went, the more I realized how many variables were out of my control. Trying to stick rigidly to my original plan only led to overwhelming and—ironically—less progress.

So I learned to pause.

Sometimes, I gave myself permission to do… nothing. And in those quiet pauses, the best ideas came. Because our brains need rest to connect the dots, to make sense of things, and to create again. Your planner doesn’t have to be perfect. Let it be a gentle companion. One that doesn’t judge you when you adjust the path.

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When Nothing Feels Clear: What to Do When You Feel Lost in Life and Face Uncertainty

3. Goals Move You Forward – But Belief Keeps You Going

Here’s something I’ve come to realize after many years of writing goal setting planner.

If you don’t believe in yourself, no productivity system in the world can carry you.

Every morning, I read a simple affirmation to remind myself:

• “I don’t need to do more to be enough.”
• “Every step I take is already a celebration.”
• “I choose to be my own source of motivation.”

These are included in The Becoming Planner, along with my Affirmation to Be Kind to Yourself card deck—a gentle daily ritual to reconnect with yourself.

Because goals are long journeys. And on those journeys, some days you’ll be tired. Some days, you’ll doubt. What you’ll need most is not someone shouting at you to “keep going”—but a quiet voice inside saying:

“You’re doing okay. Keep walking. I believe in you.”

As I’ve shared in previous posts, affirmations aren’t just feel-good words—they’re a scientifically backed tool for reshaping our inner dialogue and rebuilding self-belief. Repeating positive statements regularly can actually activate the parts of the brain linked to self-processing and reward, helping us stay grounded and more aligned with our goals. And if you’re curious about the science, here’s a study published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience. 

4. Write Your Goal setting planner with Love, Not Fear

illustrated by miodoi

If you’re looking for a new way to begin 2025, here’s an invitation:

Set goals not to “fix yourself”… but to be kind to yourself.

A planner can be more than a checklist. It can be a space for creativity, healing, and soft direction.

Here are a few ideas to begin:

• Spend a quiet afternoon reflecting on 2024 and dreaming about 2025.
• Choose 1–3 goals that truly call to you.
• Write down how you want to feel, not just what you want to achieve.
• Add affirmations around those goals.
• And always leave space for doing nothing sometimes. That’s part of the plan too.

Final Thought: Let your goal setting planner Be a Homecoming, Not a Competition

Setting fewer goals doesn’t mean you’re less ambitious. Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is pause, to rest and to believe that you don’t have to prove anything to deserve a full, beautiful life. I wish you a 2025 filled with kind intentions, a goal setting planner that loves you back, and a spirit that knows how to smile— even before any goal is checked off.